Creating a Culture of Appreciation
By Chrissie Kaufmann, on behalf of the YMCA of Greater Michiana
Valentine’s Day is that one special day of the year when we are blissfully free to declare our love. I fondly remember the excitement of Sweet-o-Gram day in elementary school. For 25 cents, we could send a message with candy to a friend, a favorite teacher, or a special someone. “Cupid,” a student council member dressed in a heart-shaped sandwich board, would dance from classroom to eager classroom, reading our poems and passing out little boxes of Sweethearts.
Hearing in public that we are valued is like getting a sunny, 60-degree day in February: the endorphin boost makes us feel fabulous. In fact, most of us would like to be told how special we are every day, not just on February 14th and not just by our sweethearts.
The past few years have been hard on all of us. The Great Resignation proves that many of us have felt undervalued at our workplaces. Those of us who have stayed at our jobs want to be noticed for picking up the slack. Remote work and virtual schooling during lockdowns and quarantines have added new pressures on the home front. If there were ever a time that we could all use extra kudos from our co-workers and our family members, it is now. So how can we get the appreciation we deserve?
Thinking back to Sweet-o-Gram day, I recall that I never had control of whether I received one, but I could always choose to send them. And truthfully, that was often the best part: seeing my friends’ faces light up when they heard “Cupid” say their name.
So maybe we need to change the question to something we can control: how can we give more appreciation in our workplaces and in our families? This shifts our focus. We begin to look for the things that others are doing right in our communities and learn how to recognize them effectively.
In their Forbes article “10 Reasons You Need to Show Appreciation Daily,” David Stuart and Todd Nordstrom cite scientific research to show that when we constructively praise our co-workers, we actually help ourselves: we become more positive, more productive, more innovative, more effective and more engaged in our work. So the person receiving the praise and the person giving the praise both benefit: it’s a win-win situation.
If we are uncomfortable verbalizing encouragement to others, we can practice on ourselves. At the end of the day, we can ask ourselves, “What is something I did well today?” We can then move on to noticing and pointing out specific things that others are contributing. Helpful phrases include “I appreciate that you…,” “I think you did a great job with…,” and “When you (insert action), it really helped us reach our goals.” We can hand-write a card, tell them in person, send an email – whatever we think they would like best.
Showing appreciation can also be as simple as saying a heartfelt “thank you” to a family member for completing a chore. And how about recognizing all the hardworking folks that keep our world turning behind the scenes: the maintenance team, housekeeping staff, office staff – we could go on and on. During this month of valentines and beyond, let’s practice creating a culture of appreciation, one positive message at a time.
